Friday, July 24, 2015


I recently read about bullying among schoolchildren. It is amazing how progressive and thoughtful the world has become. I always thought schoolyard taunting and name-calling was just something you have to endure at school. I used to get bullied, although it was never anything I couldn't handle. It usually happened every time I changed school, because it's just so much fun to pick on the new kid. But once they found out how unfazed and smug I was in the face of adversity, they got tired and simply stopped. 

Although maybe my smugness was the reason why I got picked on. I was the pale skinned, chubby faced kid with a permanent smirk on his face, and rolling is the default position of my eyes. I could never answer a question unsarcastically, and I looked down on everybody, even the headmasters/headmistresses. Self-esteem has just never been an issue for me, unless having too much of it is an issue.

Come to think of it, I wonder how I made it out of primary school unscathed because if I had a time machine, even I would travel back in time and beat the shit out of 9-year-old me. 

That makes me wonder: would I be a better person if I had never been bullied? Or did bullying help me build character? Would I turn out to be a weak person if I hadn't had to endure mental torture from my big brother every day growing up? Or am I better off because of it? How did bullying contribute to my present being, and how much of that contribution is beneficial/detrimental? Is trauma inherently bad for a person, or do you actually need at least some amount of trauma in order to excel in life? 

I'm going to find someone to fund my thesis on this subject.

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